Needs to be addressed
I'm sorry...I know I just did one of these, but there's something that really needs to be addressed. MY DAD SUCKS MAJOR MAN MEAT.
I am way pissed at my dad because he's just a dumbass. He seems to think it's alright to go screw different women for 15 years and then when he's called on his actions...he runs like a little fricken girl. You see, 6 years ago my mom found out he was having affairs with different women and kicked him out of the house. He's been claiming to work on his problems since then, but he hasn't...like at all. Long story short, my mom is gettin that bastard outta here. So now she's asking the church to excommunicate him...that's what happens when you disobey the church knowingly when they tell you that you need to do something, or stop doing something in his case. He doesn't think he's done anything wrong to the church though and he thinks that the trial for his excommunication is unnecessary and it's hurting his family and him. It's not the trial, it's that he doesn't care enough to try and fix himself. Who is he to say that...seriously? I've come to the conclusion that he doesn't love me since he won't make the effort to change for me. I know I deserve to be loved, I like myself and that's that. But I hate that f*#@ b^&@ (keepin it PG) because he made it so that my brother doesn't know that he should be loved. Just read his entry "My Thorn" in the link to his blog on the right. My mom has to deal with all that crap too.
Why does he do this? AHHHHHH! WHAT A DUMBASS!!!!!! Now our family struggles with fricken finances and my mom's gonna get laid off soon. GOSH I DON'T LIKE THAT...THING. I'm numb to hurt now...well...I feel, but I haven't cried, in a situation where it makes sense to cry, for a LONG time...I don't remember when the last time was. I hate it...I can't cry. Nothing compares to the pain of knowing your father doesn't love you. Well, I'm sure there are things that compare, but I haven't found them yet. I feel like it's worse than a regular dad that loves their kids dying. At least they know that their dad loved them. Mine's too selfish to love me or try to come back when he knows he could.
I know this probably sounds like I think my problems are worse than any of yours, but that's completely not true. I think we all have our own problems that are just as bad as everyone else's, just different. I'm scared someone's going to write me saying that it's a terrible to think losing a dad isn't as bad as your problem, cuz I actually do think that's worse, I was just trying to find a way to portray how bad it hurts. I'm done feeling sorry for myself. Sorry if I mad you mad for some reason in this entry, but I needed to get it out there.
I am way pissed at my dad because he's just a dumbass. He seems to think it's alright to go screw different women for 15 years and then when he's called on his actions...he runs like a little fricken girl. You see, 6 years ago my mom found out he was having affairs with different women and kicked him out of the house. He's been claiming to work on his problems since then, but he hasn't...like at all. Long story short, my mom is gettin that bastard outta here. So now she's asking the church to excommunicate him...that's what happens when you disobey the church knowingly when they tell you that you need to do something, or stop doing something in his case. He doesn't think he's done anything wrong to the church though and he thinks that the trial for his excommunication is unnecessary and it's hurting his family and him. It's not the trial, it's that he doesn't care enough to try and fix himself. Who is he to say that...seriously? I've come to the conclusion that he doesn't love me since he won't make the effort to change for me. I know I deserve to be loved, I like myself and that's that. But I hate that f*#@ b^&@ (keepin it PG) because he made it so that my brother doesn't know that he should be loved. Just read his entry "My Thorn" in the link to his blog on the right. My mom has to deal with all that crap too.
Why does he do this? AHHHHHH! WHAT A DUMBASS!!!!!! Now our family struggles with fricken finances and my mom's gonna get laid off soon. GOSH I DON'T LIKE THAT...THING. I'm numb to hurt now...well...I feel, but I haven't cried, in a situation where it makes sense to cry, for a LONG time...I don't remember when the last time was. I hate it...I can't cry. Nothing compares to the pain of knowing your father doesn't love you. Well, I'm sure there are things that compare, but I haven't found them yet. I feel like it's worse than a regular dad that loves their kids dying. At least they know that their dad loved them. Mine's too selfish to love me or try to come back when he knows he could.
I know this probably sounds like I think my problems are worse than any of yours, but that's completely not true. I think we all have our own problems that are just as bad as everyone else's, just different. I'm scared someone's going to write me saying that it's a terrible to think losing a dad isn't as bad as your problem, cuz I actually do think that's worse, I was just trying to find a way to portray how bad it hurts. I'm done feeling sorry for myself. Sorry if I mad you mad for some reason in this entry, but I needed to get it out there.
posted by Nathan at 7:08 PM
1 Comments:
nathan...i'm really sorry! thats really awful! i would say i know how you feel...but that would be a lie...i have no idea how you feel! i'm really sorry though! and if you ever need anyone to talk to...you know i'm here for you! always!! luvs! -emily!!
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